Beached whale sightings

At the beach it's cute to see little kids running around when they're naked and jumping into the waves. But when middle aged, and out of shape people are only wearing shreds of clothing and doing the same thing, the cuteness factor is nonexistent. Some of these people today blew my mind a bit. I mean it was my first time at the beach in about a year, and I clearly forgot how bold and or brave that some people are. I mean it was both men and women just wearing some rediculous bathing suits. I mean more power to them for having the self esteem to go out in public the way they did and be comfortable with their self image, but they looked rediculous. The amount of big girls wearing string bikinis was redonkulous, as I saw more rolls than in a bakery. To be polite it was visually displeasing. It also reminded me of how out of shape most americans are. There was one lady in a yellow shirt, and my sister pointed her out to me and said "hey look the sun came out." I then preceded to follow with "its like those jimmy dean commercials minus the suit. Speaking of Jimmy Dean, he just died." We both preceded to laugh fairly hard and then realize the special kind of hell that we're going to when we pass and how we'll save eachother a seat if we go before the other one.
Sadly enough though, that women was morbidly obese. Unfortuantely both sexes came out swinging today as the amount of man boob out, or chesticles as I like to call them, was quite unsightly as well. The worst were the older gentlemen who looked like they were wearing sweaters when it was infact a deadly combination of back and chest hair and to top it all off were wearing speedos. This one old guy looked like he stuffed a squirrel into his crotch. Makes me shutter just to think about it.
I mean i'm glad those people are comfortable with themselves, but they need to realize that they burn unsightly images into peoples heads that are hard to get out. Just think of the children when you go out in public, thats all I'm saying.

If you dont have something to say then why'd you open your mouth for?

A few days ago I went into the city to go play ball at my moms school and seeming that I dont have a license and have no car, I took good ole public transportation. However when I left the house I completely forgot what time it was. Not that I was going to be late or anything like that, but I soon realized that it was the time when St. Agnes, which is two blocks away from my apartment, let out. Thankfully it wasn't that bad and I got a spot on the q65 but that wasn't my issue. Thankfully I had my music to take me away to a different place so I wouldn't lose brain cells by listening to the unrelenting mindless drivel that was coming out of their mouths. If I didn't have my mp3 player with me, then I would have beat my head against a hand rail till things went black. Unfortunately at some times some of their conversations went through cause my head phones are pretty weak. I kept hearing random things, like "oh girl your hair looks good" at least twenty times from like four different people. Then they would say it to someone else, like they were stuck on repeat and thats all they could say. The worst was when the bus got filled and we passed stops with people and some girl kept saying "oh sorry, good try though" and her crew of 8 or 10 girls laughed as if they didn't hear it about eight times before. It just reminded me of how much I hated bus rides like that back in high school, but fortunately those days are gone. I don't know what it is, but I have a severe dislike for small talk. It just rubs me the wrong way. I mean if it has some importance like if its some sort of information you need to know, like asking about homework, or asking for directions where your recieving some sort of pertinent information instead of saying something just to say it then thats fine. Atleast you're getting something out of it. It annoys me when someone who rarely speaks to me just says some random shit to me and then keeps on their way, or says nothing else after that. If you're gonna have a conversation with me, then lets talk, but if you just gonna say "oh I like your hat," and then just sit there next to me for 20 mins without saying something else or try to say something when I'm walking in a different direction, please save your breath. I'd rather just get a head nod or a quick hi or hey. If your saying something just to say it, without any meaning behind it, then just don't say it at all. Theres enough people who say enough stupid shit on the regular, don't be one of them.

-peace & love

Im looking forward to running?

This summer, for the lack of the better term, is so big for me. The fact that I actually got a decent paying job definitely helps. I won't have to wake up at five thirty to walk to those evil golden arches and be pissed off everyday at the fact that i'm coming home smelling like some nasty fries. That and the fact that I would have to get up at the same time the next day and do the same thing all over again. I mean the other people that worked there were chill, but I wanted to reach out that drive through window and slap the shit out of the people in their cars some times. But thankfully I'll never be in that situation again now that I got this summer camp job. But besides having this summer job this is a big time for me for ball.
I mean this year i shit the bed. Whenever I had a chance to prove myself in a game, i fucked up. It pisses me off right now thinking about it because I know I could have played better in important games. Everyone said, oh you got some decent time as a freshman, but i don't want that. I want to actually contribute. The worst thing was that I played well in the scrimmages and in the beginning of the year, but I got to satisfied with that. I wasn't agressive enough. I feel like I'm back at high school because I thought that I'd play well, and in the beginning few weeks I did. But like in highschool my ass got splinters at the end of the year, but not because I didn't get hurt, i just didn't get any burn.
This summer though is all thought on work and ball though. I'm looking forward to working out and running because I don't want to be where I was before. I was so depressed in the middle of the year that I was a split decision from giving in my jersey atleast five or six times. The combination of not playing and playing like ass from time to time just made me feel like a waste. Like I was wasting my time, my coaches time, and my parents money. It was like I didn't matter at all.
Even though i felt like ass at the end of the season I still finished out. I've never quit at anything before in my life, especially at ball. If i did it would have just made things worse.
After I got out of my funk i realized that I was living out my dream. I never thought I would play in college. I was always hurt in high school and thought I would be done after that. But one summer gave me hope. After a few camps i got some letters from a bunch of different schools. Seeing those letters were probably one of the happiest moments of my life. My self esteem was through the roofs. I made my way back from 6 different injuries throughout High school, where people told me I would never be good enough. But I proved them wrong.
Now this summer I've got this chip on my shoulder to show the coaches in the fall that I can be a contributor. Every sprint, every lift, is all for the fall. Also the last game of the season is burned into my brain. That loss to WPI and the way we lost is also determination. Right now i'm just trying to think one day at a time, but I can;t wait for our first game against them. Theres gonna be hell to pay. But for now I just gotta think about the run tomorrow.

-peace & love